1. |
Nightmare
02:11
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1. Nightmare
2020-02-27 @ 02:53am
lyrics
You know what doesn't make the faintest tingle of a lick of sense?
The fact that when we go to sleep, our minds
Get busy telling tales devoid of reasoning and evidence
Then scare you with the stories that they find
They turn a sweet surrender to hallucinated hellishness
And then get even worse, for heaven's sake
For if that's not enough to shine a light upon its selfishness
It sometimes does it when we're wide awake
You're feeling pretty good but then start building situations
That would never happen, not that you will care
As you're too full of sadness, anger hurt and consternation
Winning scuffles with a foe who isn't there
So when these thoughts come round, just leave them be, let them wash over you
Like waves upon the sand all soft and golden
For though there may be wisdom in their over-cautious overview
You're free to learn without being beholden
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2. |
A Nice Person
01:17
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You know what doesn't make the faintest tingle of a lick of sense?
The fact that when we go to sleep, our minds
Get busy telling tales devoid of reasoning and evidence
Then scare you with the stories that they find
They turn a sweet surrender to hallucinated hellishness
And then get even worse, for heaven's sake
For if that's not enough to shine a light upon its selfishness
It sometimes does it when we're wide awake
You're feeling pretty good but then start building situations
That would never happen, not that you will care
As you're too full of sadness, anger hurt and consternation
Winning scuffles with a foe who isn't there
So when these thoughts come round, just leave them be, let them wash over you
Like waves upon the sand all soft and golden
For though there may be wisdom in their over-cautious overview
You're free to learn without being beholden
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3. |
Cartoon Violence
01:07
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A cartoon that depicts cartoons
(I will not mention any branded)
Animates the art within the art
To that exact same standard
What that means is through the eyes
Of those within the cartoon world
Is that, before their eyes, a scene
Of graphic realism's unfurled
Imagine watching cat and mouse
In hyperbolic violent strife
Have at it with chainsaws and bombs
And have it look like real life?
So in the end, we watch these folk
Enjoy this photographic gore
It seems a little strange to me
So I won't think upon it more
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4. |
Muffins and Cupcakes
01:32
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Muffins are to cupcakes
As a smoothie is to muffins
It is said they're more nutritious for their size
But look beneath the curtain
There are calories for certain
Lurking hidden in this petit four of lies
Perhaps the blame lies solely
On those admen all-unholy
Who like cunning foxes preyed upon your gran
By wit and guile stealthy
Claiming muffins were a healthy
Food for breakfast cause they held a bit of bran
There's those who'd make a merry din
And say 'those daft Americans
Who'd eat this carby demon for their breakfast'
But woe, your credibility
Has taken quite a hit, you see
Through somehow voting favourably
For Brexit
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5. |
Hairy
00:52
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The body's quite a hairy thing
From tip of tail to nose
The frosted tips of blondie spikes
And hobbity big toes
And though there's thousands on the head
And quite a few down south
You will not feel a single one
Unless it's in your mouth
Or wand'ring errant in your eye
Or in your nose unpleasing
Leading you to tear up or
Dissolve in frantic sneezing
And come to think of it, you have
Ten toenails you don't feel
But if a single one is in your eye,
The pain is real
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6. |
Smashing
02:20
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Oh, see the online gamer
He wields a curious power
A telekenisis cum ventriloquy
His pistol-wielding competence
Sends ripples cross the continents
And here it is in one soliloquy:
Though he won't shift a single hair
Ensconced within his gaming chair
The door locked firmly, snug within the doorway
A single bullet, deftly placed
Inside the cyber foe he faced
Could cause a very real effect in Norway
As in a fit of livid rage
His adversary in this stage
Could smash the nearest object in his room
And thus, this odd duality
This virtual reality
Has bought a very real mug to its doom
Heh, DOOM
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7. |
Carcinogenera
02:27
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How to sell more cigarettes?
That's the question, here's the answer
Team up with big Pharma, lads
And get to curing cancer
Your product is unique in that
It kills you if you use it right
So cut the carc'nogenic threat
And watch your sales reach dizzy heights
You'll make a buck with every pack
Of this modern disease you sell
Then make another on the back
Of selling them the cure as well
As far as business models go,
It's player of the day
In terms of ethics, well
It occupies a place more grey
They'll live to smoke another day
All thanks to pharmaceuticals
The cigs won't take your life away -
Though still blackens your cuticles
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8. |
On Inspiration
00:54
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To recognise someone of fortune and fame
A person of notable note
Just look for the words uttered under their name
And summed in a quotable quote
There's people out there known for padding and waffle
Expounding in chapter and verse
Tossing out paragraphs like they're a quaffle
While others are rather more terse
But there's one out there who is instantly known
Without having uttered a word
Their name on the tip of each tongue on its own
As soon as his breathing is heard
We all use the same words for sentiments captured
You'll work them out sooner or later
But when he respires, you will listen enraptured
To the inhalations of Darth Vader
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9. |
Ambidextrous
00:56
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You may be ambidextrous
May have been so all your life
But I would wager you've not cut
Both hands off with a knife
For once the first has left the wrist
It becomes quite a chore
To find a way to leave the other
Tumbling to the floor
But even as I say this, I predict
There'll be defiance
Stupidity is infinite
But so, dear friends, is science
For though we've reached a point
Where reattachment is no pain
I'd still not trust us not to make
The same mistake again
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10. |
Unum Ovum
00:40
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We're only just the last
Of eighty million sperm to die
We're fourscore years behind the rest
It's not hard to see why
For as the humble Croque Monsieur
(that costs an arm and leg)
Transforms into a Croque Madame
With just a single egg,
So too, do we become anew
When ova join the fray
We live to thrash our tails
Another century and day
Until we join our counterparts
In death, but here's the issue
Not one will see longevity
When they end up in a tissue.
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11. |
The Chair
01:00
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The gaming chair most popular
(Beware, for I shall spoil it)
Is not some fancy leather thing
Instead, a humble toilet
For lifetimes worth of candy crush
Go by each earthly hour
Within the hands of those who sit
In plain sight of the shower
To sit and think about this fact
Does good for weary souls
We play this great and modern sport
Perched upon a super bowl
A sanctuary versatile
This comfy gaming loo
And there's a chance you heard this song
While perched upon it, too
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12. |
Spectres
01:48
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We fear the ghosts of the distant past
As they dress with retrospective class
Eternal and translucent souls
In gingham dresses clutching dolls
But wouldn't it be less a fright
To see these spectres late at night
All dressed up for a TV dinner
Fiddling with fidget spinners?
Your heart would be left in no lurch
To see them wearing Youtube merch
In fact, it would be kind of neat
To spy the crocs upon their feet
But there's exception to all that
To see one in a MAGA hat
And, thinking on it gives me jive
They're scary when they're still alive
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13. |
Gravity
01:07
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Gravity, oh gravity
It keeps us on the floor
But really it's the floor that proves its worth
It stops our good friend gravity
From swallowing galore
To bring us to the very core of Earth
How odd, then, that it's gravity
That holds the floor so steady
To keep it all from doing the same to us
In fact, we owe our safety
To all those it beat already
In a heap, thousand miles deep, without a fuss
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14. |
Termites
02:02
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Never in the history of man or raving beast
Was a greater show of trust displayed than in the middle east
When Noah packed a pair of termites on his wooden boat
And trusted that they'd leave the ship of humankind afloat
...Turns out they did
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15. |
14.5
01:00
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I wish, if only for a laugh
I could be fourteen and a half
So all these rambling words prophetic
Might look slightly less pathetic
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Pointless Frogspawn Adelaide, Australia
Pointless Frogspawn is a combination of Pointless Account and Frogspawn, malefactors on February Album Writing Month who bend time and space to win a pointless trophy with strange lyrics and stranger music and song. They're so bad that bandcamp won't let them back on their own show until recently! ... more
